In Tennessee, we know the value of hard work, community, and family — and those lessons start right at home. Teaching children to pitch in around the house isn’t just about keeping things tidy. It’s about raising capable, confident, and compassionate people who understand that everyone has a role to play in making family life work.
Why Chores Matter
Research shows that giving children household responsibilities can improve their self-esteem, academic performance, and social skills. Chores help kids develop executive function — the ability to plan, stay organized, and follow through — all while reinforcing the idea that they are important contributors to their family.
As the American Academy of Pediatrics advises, “Young children are naturally eager helpers. … Helping to keep the home running smoothly boosts a child’s self-esteem.”
That means even small, simple tasks — like carrying napkins to the table or feeding the family dog — can give a child a sense of pride and belonging. That pride in contribution is a gift that lasts a lifetime. In Tennessee, chores often carry the bonus of connecting kids to our local rhythms — from tending the garden before a summer storm to prepping for tailgate snacks in the fall.
How to Help Kids Succeed at Chores
- Start Small and Show How – Especially for young children, model the task first. Show them how you like the toys sorted into bins or how to gently water plants without overfilling the pot.
- Keep It Positive – Praise effort over perfection. The goal is learning and participation, not a spotless kitchen.
- Make It Routine – Tie chores to regular parts of the day: setting the table before supper, feeding pets after breakfast, or folding laundry while watching a favorite show.
- Work Side-by-Side – Kids love doing things with their parents. A shared task can feel like quality time.
Age-by-Age Chore Ideas — and How to Make Them Meaningful
Rather than just handing your child a list, think about how the task connects to their abilities and your family life.
Toddlers (2–3 years)
At this stage, the “helping” is often more symbolic than productive — and that’s okay. Let them put toys back into baskets, carry plastic cups to the sink, or help push laundry into the dryer. They’ll beam with pride at being “big enough” to help. Kids feel capable when they’re “allowed” to help.
Ideas:
- Put toys in baskets – Builds sorting skills and ownership over belongings.
- Carry lightweight groceries – A loaf of bread or a bag of apples from the car to the kitchen.
- Help feed pets – Pouring kibble into the dog’s bowl teaches care for animals.
- Wipe lower cabinet doors – Use a damp cloth; they can reach their own level.
- Water potted plants – Perfect for sunny Tennessee porches in spring and summer.
- Hand you laundry items – Passing you socks or shirts helps fine motor coordination.
Preschoolers (4–5 years)
Children this age can start to take on small, independent jobs: matching socks, wiping off a table with a damp cloth, or helping water flowers. They’re ready for more independence and can start doing tasks from start to finish.
Ideas:
Help pack their backpack for preschool – Encourages organization.
Make their bed – Even if it’s imperfect, it builds routine and responsibility.
Sort silverware – Matching spoons and forks is a fun sorting game.
Help set the table – Napkins, cups, or safe plates for supper.
Match socks – Great for pattern recognition.
Water flowers or garden plants – Let them use a child-size watering can.
Collect eggs from backyard chickens – A favorite in rural Tennessee homes.
Elementary (6–11 years)
Now kids can manage chores that require more coordination and follow-through, like sweeping the porch, packing their own lunchbox, or helping wash the car. Tie the work to real family benefits — “When you clean up the living room, we will be able to have more seating space for a movie night.” These years are perfect for introducing regular responsibility tied to family needs.
Ideas:
- Sweep or vacuum common areas – Gives a visible result they can be proud of.
- Fold laundry – Especially towels and smaller clothing items.
- Pack their own lunch – With a little supervision for balanced choices.
- Dust furniture – Especially reachable surfaces like coffee tables.
- Take out small trash bins – Great for teaching care for shared spaces.
- Help with yard work – Raking leaves in fall or picking up sticks before mowing.
- Assist with cooking – Stirring cornbread batter or assembling sandwiches.
- Help plan part of a meal – Choosing a vegetable side or dessert.
Middle School (11–14 years)
Tweens are ready for more responsibility: mowing the lawn, loading and unloading the dishwasher, or cooking simple meals. Let them take ownership. Tweens can handle multi-step chores and ones that require planning ahead.
Ideas:
Run the vacuum through the whole house – Adds a sense of thoroughness.
Mow the lawn – With supervision and clear safety rules.
Load and unload the dishwasher – A regular after-dinner responsibility.
Do their own laundry – Washing, drying, folding, and putting away.
Cook a simple dinner – Tacos, spaghetti, or grilled cheese night.
Organize a closet or pantry – Great for developing planning skills.
Wash the family car – A satisfying outdoor chore in warm weather.
Babysit younger siblings briefly – Builds trust and leadership.
High School (14–18 years)
Teens should handle complex chores that prepare them for independence: managing their own laundry, grocery shopping with a list, or planning and cooking a family dinner once a week. This is also the perfect age to include them in budgeting for groceries or household supplies. Teens are ready for tasks that prepare them for life after graduation.
Ideas:
Assist with younger siblings’ activities – Driving them to practice (if licensed) or helping with homework.
Manage their own schedule – Keeping track of sports, work, and school deadlines.
Shop for groceries using a budget – Real-life money skills.
Prepare a full family meal weekly – From menu to clean-up.
Maintain outdoor spaces – Mowing, weeding, mulching.
Deep-clean common spaces – Bathrooms, kitchen, garage.
Help with household maintenance – Changing light bulbs, cleaning gutters with supervision.
Plan a family event – From a picnic in Percy Warner Park to a movie night at home.
Finding the Right Balance
The key is matching responsibility to ability — enough to stretch their skills, but not so much that they feel overwhelmed. Over time, these tasks become habits and, more importantly, part of how your child sees themselves: as someone who makes meaningful contributions to their family and community.
Chores might seem like a small thing, but they build big character. In homes across Tennessee — from Memphis kitchens to Mountain City porches — they’re a daily opportunity to teach life skills, responsibility, and pride in a job well done. And as the American Academy of Pediatrics reminds us, those small acts of helping can have a lifelong impact on a child’s confidence and sense of belonging.